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The Imperfect Homeschooler |
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Making Homeschooling Happiness Last
Lately I’ve been spending my Friday afternoons driving my 15-year-old daughter to her homeschool biology class at our county’s community college. It takes about half an hour to get there, and that half-hour coincides with the second half of Dennis Prager’s “Happiness Hour.” If you’ve don’t know who Mr. Prager is, the short version is that he’s a radio talk show host. He covers a variety of issues on his show, but he reserves an hour of show time every Friday for his “Happiness Hour.” Mr. Prager believes that happiness is something we make, not something that happens to us, and he devotes that hour to talk with callers and his radio audience about how people can be happy and stay that way, no matter what their circumstances. Kind of sounds like the apostle Paul, doesn’t it? “….I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” (Philippians 4:11) Mr. Prager theorizes that women have more problems than men when it comes to happiness; it would seem, based on his callers, that his theory is probably accurate. Having listened to his show many times, I’ve learned that there are an awful lot of women out there who are unhappy…. with their spouses, their children, their parents, and their coworkers. In fact, now that I think about it, I personally know several women who are unhappy. But I find it especially interesting is that none of the unhappy women I know are homeschoolers. Now, I’m not saying all of my homeschooling friends live charmed lives. Some have marital issues or rebellious kids. Some, like me, have a child with a disability. Many have financial troubles. Yet they seem to face those difficulties with resolve and optimism, and I cannot think of any who appear to be basically unhappy people. On the other hand, the unhappy women I know either don’t have kids, or they did but their kids have grown and gone. I think that’s a clue right there. Having kids makes us happy. Being around them keeps us young, and also keeps us busy, which keeps our minds on them and not so much on ourselves. For homeschoolers, happiness goes beyond just having kids. Being with our kids every day and watching them make discoveries about the world around them creates joy in our hearts. We are also privileged to witnesses their victories. Learning to read, |
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Cardamom Publishers P.O. Box 81 Algonquin, IL 60102-0081 |
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figuring out long division, creating something at least as well as Mom or Dad can…….these milestones are nothing if not happy occasions. And then there’s the sheer amount of work we do every day. Keeping busy is a key to happiness, and who’s busier than a homeschooling mom? We’ve got kids 24/7, meals to cook, a home to keep up, and a husband to make a home for, not to mention outside activities (ours and the kids’), extended family, church and/or community…….we invented busy! And what a blessing it is. So, if we can agree that homeschooling is a lifestyle that engenders happiness, what will happen when we’re no longer homeschooling? When our kids set off on their own and don’t need us the way they once did? Whether we stay home or head out into the world of work, can we find a way to spend our days that’s as fulfilling as this wonderfully consuming season of our life? Will we end up like those unhappy women they talk about on the radio? Back to Dennis Prager, who believes that we are responsible for our own happiness. He says it’s not up to our spouses, our children, or anyone else to make us happy. If that’s true, how will we create happiness when our homeschooling days are over? The same way we’re creating it now….through service to others. After all, raising and teaching our children is service, pure and simple. It’s in the giving of ourselves and the witnessing of the resultant benefits to our children that we find real happiness. Our happiness will continue as long as we continue to serve others. It won’t be hard to find opportunities for service. After all, our children will eventually move out, but they’ll still need our help at times. Our husbands will surely enjoy having us all to themselves again, and we’ll finally have time to do special things for them. And our communities and churches will always have needs that we can fill. In fact, there are so many needs in the world that I’m sure we’ll have no problem finding ways to serve others. And as long as that remains our focus, we will continue to be happy people, even after we’re done homeschooling, instead of falling into the unhappiness that is so often seen among women today.
© 2007 Cardamom Publishers/Barbara Frank
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